The Photo On The Fridge!

PhotoOnFridgeGrowing up my parents insisted that we pay attention to not only academics but athletics as well … Both team and those exercise regimens that would provide health and well being – hopefully a life long joy and benefit provided. So there was tennis lessons, later on golf and more. But this essay is mostly about appearance and even though my two older brothers also attentive to matters of weight and such – being the only daughter meant this topic needed addressing even more. The honest and evident truth is that in spite of my Mother being an early on feminist she was aware of the reality of being a woman in our society – that is looks do matter.

Important to mention that my parents were also exacting in instruction that while appearance indeed important it was NEVER to be our main life focus nor that which dictated our choices. Complex ideas I agree but that was the tonality and wonderfulness of being my parents child – all beneficial and substantive – of lifelong benefit and that which until this day at sixty years old I am beneficiary to in many important ways.

So why title this essay “The Photo On The Fridge“? you must be thinking. Well when I was a teen and young woman it was a very popular notion – often suggested in magazine – to cut out that gorgeous model’s photo that you admire and longed to look like to place on refrigerator in order to deter you from consuming those extra calories. In my parents homes there was to be none of that …Too close to what one might say is cult like “false idol worship“, which by the way I agree with even now. Instead what was promoted as part of our healthy lifestyle was if thinking this or that beautiful and well toned individual might be what we ourselves aspired to then by all means take into consideration how they might maintain that appearance – needless to say ONLY if a balanced way in reference to nutrition ad such.

My parents cleverly intoned the idea of what one might describe as a “non compete clause” in all they taught us … That is never was envy to be impetus for that we all know leads to self hatred and evil actions in many instances as the envious individual needs to soothe their insecurity with the mantra “I have what REALLY matters”– which of course is a case of thou profess too much. How relates to our topic at hand? Simply that by ignoring ones own either less than realistically healthy or attractive appearance or that if so than the mere fact that by being somewhat of a poseur with no substantive content to fall back on that unconscious and mentally unstable insecurity leads to self destructive activity against self and others. All in all best and actually ONLY healthful productive way to live is being 100% honest with self about all aspects of ones life – than as my parents taught and I do children – decide, plan and begin to achieve that which you need and want whether in appearance, professional achievements and even acquired lifestyle items [home and hearth one might say]. This my dear readers is singularly in being both REALLY happy and having desired life accomplishments – no energies wasted nor misdirection from goals.

My words here do not mean one can not use examples of those they would love to be more like nor those they wish – – maybe even fear becoming like … Motivation toward or away from that which has created a person you believe demonstrates template which might inform you toward a positive direction and equally those [as some I write about] of whom you by knowing much about them are lessons in what becoming would be disastrous and far from your own chosen path. Now here an important lesson [one of] my late wise erudite Mother insisted I learn must be mentioned. Never be as your nemesis that serves as example and motivation away from that which your fear being by denying that small part of them that might indeed be [especially in consideration of their backgrounds and reality] accomplished – no for then you are only as unstable or as unsuccessful in REAL terms as they are  and likewise no longer able to use them as lesson on how not to live. So you see being REALLY honest about both those you admire and aspire to be like – never placing those people in false idol status and accepting with documented and honest observation those you fear becoming like you have the perfect motivation and contentment.

Well I end this essay with a confession … Grant it I believe beneath my intellectual and Jewish faith instruction but what the hell right? The miscreant nemesis you often read about in my blog – those my husband are suing and pursuing prosecution against are the prime daily example to myself, my husband, family and friends of what NOT to be in life … On many levels I assure you but as this essay is about appearance mostly – well as a woman – that too. You see and here I must not be less than blunt … Both lack of willingness to either take time and effort or denial of their REAL presentation to self and world leaves many let us say that photo on my fridge and elsewhere that leads AWAY from everything they are, are not, do and do not do … Yes I fear becoming them and let me tell you that is REAL motivation. Quite beneath us but my hubby often jokes he will assist me in my already rather healthy compulsory attention to nutrition, exercise, skin care and other by printing out certain individuals photos for me as reminders. Naughty are we not? Actually no need for that as these people ever present through the documentation of previous and their still stalking, harassing and worse us – as well as preparation for soon legal cases and my publishers hope after my contracted first two books, I agree to another singularly about my nemesis. Oh and by the way this is not hyperbole for I REALLY do fear ever being like these individuals … Of course as my family, friends and colleagues remind me that could actually never happen – thank G-d!


 

Fash Bash In Detroit Matters !

DIA Diego Rivera Mural

Diego Rivera – Detroit Industry

The Louvre in France, my hometown Philadelphia Art Museum and other wonderful places my life has been blessed with visits to created for me both love and determination that my life … Those of my family and others, no matter the circumstances, must include that which the soul feeds on, the heart is gladdened by and the mind made to contemplate other than oneself.  So too it seems was that impetus for the storied Scripps family of Detroit in 1881. Not difficult to understand having felt quite the same visceral compulsion after myself being able to purview the great works of art in museums throughout Europe how James E. Scripps desired to bring home to Detroit part of that grandeur and beauty. After his travelogue, Five Months Abroad  was published  in The Detroit News other well established Detroit citizens were convinced by that newspaper’s editor, William H. Brearly, to contribute toward the establishment of then named Detroit Museum of Art. So you see dear readers as in many American cities, art and culture were the gift by the few for the many … Blessings bestowed and legacies bequeathed a truly American democratic format. Now to maintain such a gift no different than when a family leaves their heirs similar responsibilities. That brings me to 2014 and the Fash Bash at the now named Detroit Institute of Art.

August 2014 Fash Bash lends to frivolity and the lure of  involvement for some otherwise possibly not taken with such venues as an art museum and as such resulting in contribution and participation that benefits all. I have been to fashion shows in many venues … Under rather odd circumstances actually thrilled to say attended Paris Fashion Week in 1991 during the Gulf War period [another time for that typical of my life “oh my” occurrence]. Must say Bravo to Neiman Marcus and the powers that be at Detroit Institute of Art for the idea to have fashion among the greatest works of art is both a pleasure and impetus for seeking beauty in life … Who could resist finery while a Rembrandt, Rubens or Bellini peers from the walls – why indeed one is almost compelled to say “yes, yes, yes” I must have this or that attire in my wardrobe.

How you may be asking did I a lifelong Philadelphia resident become so enamored of the recent DIA fashion event … Well simple answer is I have traveled extensively both domestically and abroad and was brought up to see that everywhere and everything my venue if so chosen. Add to that that my dear devoted husband was born and raised in Michigan and it is our desire as seems now the means will soon be our blessing to contribute toward the historic and currently in need American city, Detroit. I was raised in a family and spent my lifetime being sure to be a part of efforts to lift others not as fortunate to places I myself knew to be of value … My husband was not similarly raised but  taught himself after moving to the East Coast and ending his previous marriage that such was the path to a full life. As the Fash Bash defines both enjoyment and contribution so too is how my husband and I do and always will live. In keeping with that as I told Kate from the DIA when she pleasantly surprised me by calling early one morning this past week, hubby and I with guests along will be [G-d willing] at next year’s DIA Fash Bash … In the best seats of course!!!

Sense and Sensibility: Travel Attire Without Offense!

LV Travel

LV Travel

In Jane Austen’s iconic book, “Sense and Sensibility” the main theme is how the family central and the women characters prevalence of excessive sensibility renders them without venue to betterment in their life fraught with difficulties. How connected to ones travel attire you ask? Well actually quite a easy analogy … far too often attempts at what some claim as “sensible” is no more than what is most readily available and as such in no need of  forethought or planning. Frequently these choices render wearer as uncomfortable as they appear untidy and unattractive – this too leaving one expending energy in defense of being assured their choice was perfect. The options are plentiful and should include practicality, protection and good taste – difficult you might be thinking to combine all these into a single travel attire choice. No dear readers – it just takes REAL effort and the introspection to not present falsely oneself to others. Sound haughty? Maybe but trust me all I suggest indeed rather basic from the beginning of our species desire to roam the globe.

All through history as we humans became mobile via donkey, horse, carriage and finally train, plane and automobile travel attire was considered both a means to protection and comfort … history also informs us that style mattered even centuries ago – foremost as recognition of status and connection to host. Sort of our tribal colors one might say … surely notation of familial status in places of destination among primary reasoning as to what attire the traveling visitor needed to choose. We only need think of the Muslim required Hijab for women to understand that being clothed other than a culture demands can be dangerous in that you seem different and hence an object of derision. So lets see – protection, comfort and status the three categories that went and still goes into what we decide to wear while embarking on excursions. Right? Too much thinking you might say? Not at all I tell you – actually maybe now more than ever these elements must and should be taken into consideration as we choose what outfit to wear for our human increasing travel to and fro.

We all can agree that the weather elements often dictate choice of travel clothes … warm, cold, rainy or other can and should determine both the travel attire and destination packed items. Safety can mean the same and also issues like recently realized need to wear compression hose on long flights [something I have done for years either to board or put on once airborne]. There is absolutely no reason safety and comfort must replace style … being fashionable always an option if only effort and thought given the matter. Why even my compression hose come in sexy lace topped thigh highs. Shoes easy too – as each and every company [both my choice of designers and lesser price options] offer that which is both travel ready and attractive. By the way, flip-flops not a plane option – especially if your feet less than pleasant to look at … you risk injury to yourself and insult to others. Having had the great privilege of private plane travel in the past I assure you not even then would or did I [despite having rather nice feet] insist host and fellow passengers be cautious so as to not injure my exposed appendages. See it is just a matter of good manners often that can lead one to make REALLY good travel choices – both self and others should be least bothered by what we wear.

Having been blessed to travel all my life … my parents being sure that was part of our family life and my continuing that discipline as an adult – wether my fourteen times to the Middle East, nearly as many to Europe and Japan twice, closer continents as twice to South America and of course, visits to Canada, almost all fifty U.S. States and a sundry of island vacations I have made travel fashion part and parcel of my excursion. Yes the days when people dressed in their best finery to board trains and planes – ladies in dresses, hats, gloves and men in dapper suits and hats as well might be gone [although I have often worn rather large glamorous sun hats when departing in sunny Florida and such places] and still I and others certainly still seem to find the energy and time to look well turned out as we embark on trips that allow for life to be expanded beyond the confines of  the daily grind. As I opened this essay with reference to the characters in Jane Austen’s novel where the strident determination to be sensible in the end deterred growth and glory, I tell you so will that same attitude in your travel clothing choices if it results in your being too preoccupied with such as  to give breadth and width as you decide what attire most appealing to yourself and those at the other end of your journey!

P.S. My travel tip for good memories besides a travel diary for longer trips is to date each and every photo … I have been doing this since a child as my Mother would instruct us to date & write a little note on back as to the where, etc.. Now made so much easier with technology … of course having a willing hubby like mine who imports all photos & makes disks for each & every trip both past & present a great advantage.

Patriotism and Jewish Fashion USA!!!

usa_4th_fashionMy people – the Jews – have long been a part of the America garment industry. We were in the so called “rag trade” when not fashionable and far from profitable … more a means to an end as the saying goes. But like so much else in our complex America narrative – through circumstance and happenstance – we turned that marginal position into a gloried and hugely successful enterprise. Simply a case of what other Americans once thought menial or too difficult a work choice becoming our path to a rages to riches biography. Names flow easily in describing department stores and fashion houses that are known or little known to be ours … began and owned by Jewish Americans. Bergdorf Goodman, Neiman Marcus, my Philadelphia family friends, Gimbels – the designers Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren, Diane Van Frustenberg and Israeli born American Elie Tahari, along with stylist/designer Rachel Zoe and my own family Philadelphia acquaintance, the generous philanthropist Sidney Kimmel whose fortune began in the clothing  industry  … these are to name just a very recognizable few.

Without a doubt this essay is about my prideful and one might say even boastful or braggart explanation of how we Jewish Americans created an industry profitable to ourselves and so many others … just the employment numbers of the fashion businesses we created are staggering and important to not only cities like New York but across the nation. Equally I am thrilled at the influences of art and design that our involvement has established. Why just alone the iconic Americana images of a lifestyle that Lauren has created defines an entirely complete and resplendent representation of who and what we are as a nation. We can not forget that twice our U.S. Olympic team has been present at the games clad in Ralph Lauren designs. Still there is a more poignant meaning that I attempt to establish for my readers … for each of these famous Jewish Americans in both small and large ways have attempted to give back to the land of either their birth or acquired citizenship that which otherwise the USA would not be the benefactor of in neither substance or tangible effects

Judaism dictates that we all perform Tikkun olam – meaning “repairing the world” actions. It seems no matter status or level of knowledge of our faith, all Jews somehow and in some way to some extent adhere to this promise. It is the simple reason we are so involved in organization and causes around the world – those in the fashion industry being no different. In this we find issues of American Jewish patriotism bred and developed. In the late 1990’s Ralph Lauren saved our 200 year old flag writing that he was part of the American Dream as son of Jewish immigrants … he responded to then President and First Lady Clinton’s request that our Star-Spangled Banner which flew during the decisive Battle of Baltimore during the War of 1812 be restored and hence persevered. Upon receiving the James Smithson Bicentennial Medal in 2014, Mr. Lauren seemed both humble and without hubris gratified that his success allowed him to do so much for our beloved nation.

Being in New York City not long after 9/11, my friend Sonia, herself in the fashion industry suggested we stroll by one of my favorite go to designers, Israeli born Elie Tahari’s on 5th Avenue to see his commissioned American flag wrapped 3 story building. When receiving an award of recognition from Elie Wiesel in 2003, Mr. Tahari explained that after 9/11 as an immigrant Persian Jew, he wanted his then infant son to see how REAL freedom was represented by something like the American flag … yes an object to him representative of his “Paradise“, the United States of America”.

So here we are July 4th, 2014 holiday weekend. I an American Jew, with Albanian Muslim Maternal Ancestry and a Catholic husband who legally took my Jewish last name/wanted same for any children G-d blessed us with … family, friends and colleagues of every race, religion and nationality – a world wide blessing of people in my life that I have been privileged to meet by traveling the world as moved by the iconic American flag as Mr.Lauren and Tahari have obviously been. Why we feel this way as each of us equally devoted to our ancestral homeland of Israeli is actually quite simple: Here in the United States of America while imperfect through our neighbors anti-semitic actions, we are still made whole and able to be successful and participatory without restriction or need to hide our pride in being Jewish – in that alone the Stars & Stripes is our banner of glory. May G-d bless America and all around the world who recognize our REAL freedoms!!!

P.S. When I met my husband 11 years ago [August 2003/married November 2003] along with each other, National Public Radio, Football and Jaguar cars – one of our first chats were about us both wearing shirts the day we met with Lauren’s Polo Pony emblem. Trust me and all who know us personally agree – that my erudite feminist hubby who loves fine dining, Naational Public Radio, classical music, etc., as well as good design in clothes and more comes from a place far different than my own and not likely to have instilled in him an appreciation as my East Coast sophisticated background did for such things. So you see it is kismet and a little of Ralph Lauren that made our match a perfect fit!!!

 

 

Introducing Teréza Style ™ — Actually Me, Feminist Fashionista !

This is my new/2nd blog. The first, HeiressMommy.wordpress.com, focuses on politics, law, history, science, current events & such … more cerebral? Not REALLY; For is not the issues of lifestyle choices, whether involves fashion, decor, design, food, architecture & such a matter of considered thought and often scholarship as well? All or a few of these things indeed result in what should be a REALLY well balanced life if one is to achieve true happiness and contentment. No matter our origins or circumstances there are innate and decisive choices made that result in the totality of our existence.

I am a proud to be 60 year young  feminist fashionista … here I hope to offer personal opinion and insight, as well as some well chosen advise that will often include experts on all that matters to how each of us live. Hoping to help and inspire the cultivation of style and a presence in the world that allows for comfort and joy each and every day. Additionally, through my own life long extensive travels a knowledge of other people and places … how others have something we can learn from and appreciate. My essays will cover clothes and accessories, makeup, cosmetic procedures, exercise, home furnishings and restaurants, theater, museums and even sports venues. There will be more … my wish is to present an intrinsic and almost visceral representation of all that makes a life REALLY worth living.

In my family we often joke that along with many other determined approaches and life philosophies my parents wanted to instill an appreciation of what it meant to be ECLECTIC … so please join me as I offer on a regular basis just that – a varied and vast wealth of experience and information that equals REAL life. Here we go!!!